Mothers Day

Mothers day is quite an odd holiday for me. Seeing that I don't have a mom on earth anymore. She went home to worship with Jesus almost seven years ago. Time flies, even when it goes by without someone you love to share it with. The first few Mothers day were very strange, I was not as sad as I was, angry. For the longest time I resented losing my mom. I clearly thought it was just totally unfair. So the first Mothers day, I just cried, but I was ten. Then the next couple of years I pretended that there was not a Mothers day. But, two years ago my sister and I went to my moms grave site in Clarksville to put flowers on her grave. For some reason that day, my heart healed...a lot. Of course I cried, but some of those tears were tears of joy. I started to realize the beauty of losing a loved one. She might of "died" but she went to live....with Jesus! Which in all honesty, I rather her be there than here. God healed my heart of the wounds her death left me with, and all the memories that haunted me and made me sad on Mothers day. Last Mothers day a really good friend on mines mom died from cancer about a week before. So, instead of mourning of my mother, I mourned with her and encouraged her through the process I was well experienced with. But as good as our God is, He gave me an incredible friend that day! And ever since me and my friend connected through losing our moms, it has been incredible to talk to someone who has and is going through the same thing as me. So tomorrow is Mothers day, and I not only want to remember the beautiful lady I shared Mothers day with every year before she died, but I want to celebrate my Aunt Jami! Of course, this seems odd unless you know my journey. Three years ago I moved in with my aunt, uncle, and three cousins. But now three years later, I consider my cousins brother and sisters, and where it is a little different with my aunt and uncle, they are still really close to me. I know that my aunt never wanted or wants to replace my mom, but she has been the closest thing to it and it has meant so much to! If I didn't have her, I might just be lost. So tomorrow, I will celebrate many things, the memories of my mom and her celebrating Mothers day in heaven with Jesus, expressing thoughts with my friend who lost her mom a year ago, and celebrating my wonderful Aunt Jami! God is good, He is faithful. In times of trouble and when you think your world is going to end, He picks you and does the "impossible".